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The Leadership Quest Blog

Why Your People Won't Have Critical Conversations

February 17, 2017

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When I talk to leaders who coach, I often get the question, "How do I get my people to have difficult conversations in my organization?" I have come to understand that this is a belief problem, not an action problem. 

Let me explain: 

Beliefs lead to judgements. Judgements lead to actions. Actions produce results. Your results reinforce your beliefs.  

Here is an example of how this cycle is one of the main reasons your people are avoiding critical conversations: 

Their belief is: Nothing will ever change here. That person will never change. 

Their judgement is: Why bother having the conversation if nothing will change? I don't have time for this. 

Their action is: They do nothing and the conversation never happens. 

The result is: Nothing changes. 

What happens is a self-fulling prophecy. It is like a hamster wheel of belief.  

There is only one way to change their belief and it is through coaching their actions. I've done some videos on how to have the conversation that will help you coach difficult conversations. 

Beliefs influence actions and only a change in actions can change beliefs. If you coach your peoples HOW to have a difficult conversation, EXPECT them to execute it, and INSPECT that they execute it, they will get good results and the results will start to change their belief. Once you have done that, they will not hesitate to continue to have crucial conversations.  

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